The Meme and Jokes Thread

[MED6753]

Pat, those cat rules are right on point. But for some unexplained reason Harley does not jump on the kitchen counters even though he's capable. But the dining table, furniture, TE benches, bathroom vanity are all fair game. And per Blondie's rules he's not allowed in the bedroom at night. So he sits outside the bedroom door at 5:30 AM and meows to be fed. I usually don't hear it so guess who feeds him?

The rules did miss one important item. The living room sofa is an acceptable substitute for a scratching post.

[Zenith]

Pat, those cat rules are right on point. But for some unexplained reason Harley does not jump on the kitchen counters even though he's capable. But the dining table, furniture, TE benches, bathroom vanity are all fair game. And per Blondie's rules he's not allowed in the bedroom at night. So he sits outside the bedroom door at 5:30 AM and meows to be fed. I usually don't hear it so guess who feeds him?

The rules did miss one important item. The living room sofa is an acceptable substitute for a scratching post.

Another rule is, "The more expensive and easily damaged a piece of furniture, the more cats are inclined to use it as a scratching post". Luxurious leather sofas are a particular target. Purpose made scratching posts, which can be bought for next to nothing, have absolutely no appeal.

[Specmaster]

Pat, those cat rules are right on point. But for some unexplained reason Harley does not jump on the kitchen counters even though he's capable. But the dining table, furniture, TE benches, bathroom vanity are all fair game. And per Blondie's rules he's not allowed in the bedroom at night. So he sits outside the bedroom door at 5:30 AM and meows to be fed. I usually don't hear it so guess who feeds him?

The rules did miss one important item. The living room sofa is an acceptable substitute for a scratching post.

Another rule is, "The more expensive and easily damaged a piece of furniture, the more cats are inclined to use it as a scratching post". Luxurious leather sofas are a particular target. Purpose made scratching posts, which can be bought for next to nothing, have absolutely no appeal.

My two are the opposite, I have a large scratch post in the hallway that they both use and in the living room we have 2 cardboard scratching pads for them, which they use. The sofa's do come into their realm if they think we are ignoring their requests to be fed however, or if we have birthday cards etc on the sideboard, Megan will jump there and slowly and methodically knock them off, one at a time. Pausing after each one to look at us to see if we are going to feed her...

[MED6753]

Pat, those cat rules are right on point. But for some unexplained reason Harley does not jump on the kitchen counters even though he's capable. But the dining table, furniture, TE benches, bathroom vanity are all fair game. And per Blondie's rules he's not allowed in the bedroom at night. So he sits outside the bedroom door at 5:30 AM and meows to be fed. I usually don't hear it so guess who feeds him?

The rules did miss one important item. The living room sofa is an acceptable substitute for a scratching post.

Another rule is, "The more expensive and easily damaged a piece of furniture, the more cats are inclined to use it as a scratching post". Luxurious leather sofas are a particular target. Purpose made scratching posts, which can be bought for next to nothing, have absolutely no appeal.

We have a scratching post which Harley will use but given the finicky nature of cats the sofa will come into play when he "feels" like it.

[MED6753]

Pat, those cat rules are right on point. But for some unexplained reason Harley does not jump on the kitchen counters even though he's capable. But the dining table, furniture, TE benches, bathroom vanity are all fair game. And per Blondie's rules he's not allowed in the bedroom at night. So he sits outside the bedroom door at 5:30 AM and meows to be fed. I usually don't hear it so guess who feeds him?

The rules did miss one important item. The living room sofa is an acceptable substitute for a scratching post.

Another rule is, "The more expensive and easily damaged a piece of furniture, the more cats are inclined to use it as a scratching post". Luxurious leather sofas are a particular target. Purpose made scratching posts, which can be bought for next to nothing, have absolutely no appeal.

My two are the opposite, I have a large scratch post in the hallway that they both use and in the living room we have 2 cardboard scratching pads for them, which they use. The sofa's do come into their realm if they think we are ignoring their requests to be fed however, or if we have birthday cards etc on the sideboard, Megan will jump there and slowly and methodically knock them off, one at a time. Pausing after each one to look at us to see if we are going to feed her...

Anything small on any table or TE bench is an open invitation to knock it on the floor. And he regularly steals the yellow BNC protective covers if I leave them on the bench.

[bd139]

We have a scratching post which Harley will use but given the finicky nature of cats the sofa will come into play when he "feels" like it.

The ex wife bought two cats. I left her one of the (Ikea) sofas because I only have room for one. She just bought new covers because the cats used it as a scratching post from day one and they were completely shredded. Hilariously she bought two new scratching posts for them, covered them in catnip. They just rub up against those and scratch the shit out of the table legs and the new sofa covers

[Specmaster]

We have a scratching post which Harley will use but given the finicky nature of cats the sofa will come into play when he "feels" like it.

The ex wife bought two cats. I left her one of the (Ikea) sofas because I only have room for one. She just bought new covers because the cats used it as a scratching post from day one and they were completely shredded. Hilariously she bought two new scratching posts for them, covered them in catnip. They just rub up against those and scratch the shit out of the table legs and the new sofa covers

How long did it take you to train them to do that

[bd139]

We have a scratching post which Harley will use but given the finicky nature of cats the sofa will come into play when he "feels" like it.

The ex wife bought two cats. I left her one of the (Ikea) sofas because I only have room for one. She just bought new covers because the cats used it as a scratching post from day one and they were completely shredded. Hilariously she bought two new scratching posts for them, covered them in catnip. They just rub up against those and scratch the shit out of the table legs and the new sofa covers

How long did it take you to train them to do that

Ha it's just kitty karma

[BU508A]

Ha it's just kitty karma

I thought, those were chameleons?

[tggzzz]

From the "Procrustes' hypothesis department", I bring you Susannah Clapp's review of Hannah Carlson's book "In Pockets: An Intimate History of How We Keep Things Close" in the London Review of Books. The whole review is fit only for speed-reading to find the only comprehensible nugget in the last couple of sentences...

Actually, most pockets are self-satirising as containers: men spill themselves all over the place because of gaping trouser pouches. Is this spilling an unconscious territorial claim? Are men particularly keen on pockets because they have vulva envy?

https://www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v46/n08 ... on-pockets

No, I don't normally reads such stuff. I was alerted to it by the "Pseuds Corner" section of "Private Eye".

[bd139]

From the "Procrustes' hypothesis department", I bring you Susannah Clapp's review of Hannah Carlson's book "In Pockets: An Intimate History of How We Keep Things Close" in the London Review of Books. The whole review is fit only for speed-reading to find the only comprehensible nugget in the last couple of sentences...

Actually, most pockets are self-satirising as containers: men spill themselves all over the place because of gaping trouser pouches. Is this spilling an unconscious territorial claim? Are men particularly keen on pockets because they have vulva envy?

https://www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v46/n08 ... on-pockets

No, I don't normally reads such stuff. I was alerted to it by the "Pseuds Corner" section of "Private Eye".

That's pretty hilarious. Top read.

Reminds me of a pub conversation I was party to about 25 years ago. A friend of mine, another Chris, was being told by an overbearing feminist (not the usual normal ones) that he had vagina envy because of his large bag he carried around. This was mostly a large bag because laptops were pretty large then, no other reason. He proudly proclaimed "you'd be surprised what I can keep under my foreskin" and the discussion was over

[tggzzz]

From the "Procrustes' hypothesis department", I bring you Susannah Clapp's review of Hannah Carlson's book "In Pockets: An Intimate History of How We Keep Things Close" in the London Review of Books. The whole review is fit only for speed-reading to find the only comprehensible nugget in the last couple of sentences...

Actually, most pockets are self-satirising as containers: men spill themselves all over the place because of gaping trouser pouches. Is this spilling an unconscious territorial claim? Are men particularly keen on pockets because they have vulva envy?

https://www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v46/n08 ... on-pockets

No, I don't normally reads such stuff. I was alerted to it by the "Pseuds Corner" section of "Private Eye".

That's pretty hilarious. Top read.

Reminds me of a pub conversation I was party to about 25 years ago. A friend of mine, another Chris, was being told by an overbearing feminist (not the usual normal ones) that he had vagina envy because of his large bag he carried around. This was mostly a large bag because laptops were pretty large then, no other reason. He proudly proclaimed "you'd be surprised what I can keep under my foreskin" and the discussion was over

Neat. I'm amazed such "sense-divergent"[1] people exist outside magazines. I always think of such ripostes later

I hope her hir companions appreciated the wit.

[1] I'm currently enjoying "Astrid and Raphaelle"/"Astrid: Murder in Paris", about a "neuro-divergent" archivist. Uniquely, it takes some care to explain how neuro-divergent people perceive the world and react.

[Cubdriver]

-Pat

[mansaxel]

..removed pic because you just saw it...

Excellent. Along the same lines as the small cars whizzing around in early Tektronix schematics, or the "BFR" logo inside large enough Cisco routers.

[mnementh]

-Pat

mnem
I'm mechanically inclined; I screw up.

[Cubdriver]

Logic gate

[tggzzz]

Logic gate

I'll have to have some railings replaced soon. I was thinking of some rather nice bullrush/water lilly/grass designs I've seen nearby, but that's surprisingly unbad.

I wonder what the software equivalent would be. Flowcharts are too ugly, but maybe the last few strands of a meal of spaghetti?

[bd139]

Software version:

c8301bbbbabc0c7a2f471c36ba7fb421.jpg

[tggzzz]

Software version:

That's the web security version, which is too specific to be interesting.

There are more artistic variants, e.g. on a national cycle route. This surrealist art installation was commissioned by Staffordshire County Council to raise the profile of National Cycle Route 54 in Burton-on-Trent, and has been shortlisted for the 2017 Turner Prize.


There are far more subtle variants, e.g. in order to provide a respite from the blistering heat of a Grimsby summer, North East Lincolnshire Council have planted an avenue of trees along this cycle-path to shade cyclists from the sun.


There a similar one near me, where telecoms, lighting and large trees are co-situated in order to encourage cyclist to roost (thus alleviating the caravan and tent problem)
https://www.google.com/maps/@51.446306, ... FQAw%3D%3D

The Dutch are, of course, much more advanced in such affairs, and their cyclists are presumed to be competent

Canal banks can provide excellent, attractive, hill-free cycle routes. This example from Volendam, The Netherlands, shows that a safe traffic free path can be created, even when space is at a premium.

[bd139]

Reminds me of the new cycle lanes in Brentford, one of which has a lamp post in the middle of it!

[tggzzz]

Reminds me of the new cycle lanes in Brentford, one of which has a lamp post in the middle of it!

A lamp post? That's just ... amateur.

Multiple lamp posts, cycle roosts, pedestrian crossings


Never forget that staircases can encourage the use of efficient low-drag recumbent bikes


Self-driving bikes don't need computers. Up yours, Tesla


Remember the old joke about the sign that says "do not throw stones at this sign"? Clearly that was the inspiration for

[bd139]

Oh some of those are terrible

The competence of people is low generally so this does not surprise me

[tggzzz]

Oh some of those are terrible

The competence of people is low generally so this does not surprise me

It is quite possible most of the people are tolerably competent, but political objectives plus long chains of command across multiple organisations cause problems.

Find idiocies near you, including Europe and Australia:
https://www.cyclestreets.net/photomap/# ... 09/-0.3040
... plus some non idiocies

[bd139]

Oh some of those are terrible

The competence of people is low generally so this does not surprise me

It is quite possible most of the people are tolerably competent, but political objectives plus long chains of command across multiple organisations cause problems.

Find idiocies near you, including Europe and Australia:
https://www.cyclestreets.net/photomap/# ... 09/-0.3040
... plus some non idiocies

Interesting!

They have a pet hate of mine https://www.cyclestreets.net/location/46263/

Cyclists should go to the left. I do! But the cycle lane is crawling with stupid mutts and their canine friends!

[tggzzz]

Oh some of those are terrible

The competence of people is low generally so this does not surprise me

It is quite possible most of the people are tolerably competent, but political objectives plus long chains of command across multiple organisations cause problems.

Find idiocies near you, including Europe and Australia:
https://www.cyclestreets.net/photomap/# ... 09/-0.3040
... plus some non idiocies

Interesting!

They have a pet hate of mine https://www.cyclestreets.net/location/46263/

Cyclists should go to the left. I do! But the cycle lane is crawling with stupid mutts and their canine friends!

Not in the least bit surprised. The best smells are always at the edge of a field; the centres are sterile deserts by comparison.

That's not surprising when you think that most interesting animals prefer not to stick out like a sore thumb, so they stay at the edge. N.B. herd-based grass grazing animals are by definition boring.

So, you can choose to work with the natural world's way of doing things, or ignorantly try to force your presumptions on the world and whine when the world doesn't care



Background: daughter's her "strong prey instinct" dog with me while she goes to Turkey. She also left me covid My being ill with that dog has long been one of her nightmares; stunningly the dog has worked out that I'm distinctly fragile, and is being a complete gentleman. Can't understand it!

That dog is famous all over the world, well at least the UK (multiple papers including the front page of the Guardian alongside the masthead/nameplate), France, Sweden, Japan, and I've possibly missed some out

c.jpg