Test Equipment Anonymous (TEA) : Discussion and Group Therapy Thread

[Zenith]

Regard him as an engineer given the instruction of developing an edible substance with certain properties conforming to a loose description of cheese. This is the low cost, high performance version of cheese, value engineered, and with certain properties desirable to McDonalds being optimised. A colour selected by a customer approval panel, looking OK when melted and with a convenient m.p., convenient storage and handling properties. and not definitely poisonous. They are not looking for something which would win the approval of cheese connoisseurs.

I've only had McDonalds a couple of times. It was OK. I'd do it again at need. I wouldn't go out of my way to have more. They've obviously managed to come up with a winning formula.

Something similar is true for supermarket potatoes. They have properties convenient for supermarkets. A similar size, smooth so they can be mechanically cleaned and are easy to peel, properties that make them easy to store, with the right facilities. Flavour, ease of storage at home and suitability for various methods of preparation, are all secondary considerations.

[Zenith]

I've found people who dispute the obvious sense of these proposals, are the same sort who go through contortions to deny the obvious fact that the earth is flat.

And the moon is made of green cheese.

You've only got to look at it to see it's made of Stilton. That's why the moon landings were a clear hoax. They came back with 20lbs of rocks, which could have come from anywhere. If they'd produced 20lbs of Stilton, it would have been much more credible.

[nixiefreqq]

didn't Wallace and Grommet settle this back in the early 90's?

[Zenith]

Yes they did in "A Grand Day Out".

We ignore the timeless wisdom of Wallace and Gromit at our peril.

[tggzzz]

Yes they did in "A Grand Day Out".

We ignore the timeless wisdom of Wallace and Gromit at our peril.

Useless facts #235: my daughter has touched one of the original Gromits, and I've touched one of the original King Kongs

[Specmaster]

Regard him as an engineer given the instruction of developing an edible substance with certain properties conforming to a loose description of cheese. This is the low cost, high performance version of cheese, value engineered, and with certain properties desirable to McDonalds being optimised. A colour selected by a customer approval panel, looking OK when melted and with a convenient m.p., convenient storage and handling properties. and not definitely poisonous. They are not looking for something which would win the approval of cheese connoisseurs.

I've only had McDonalds a couple of times. It was OK. I'd do it again at need. I wouldn't go out of my way to have more. They've obviously managed to come up with a winning formula.

Something similar is true for supermarket potatoes. They have properties convenient for supermarkets. A similar size, smooth so they can be mechanically cleaned and are easy to peel, properties that make them easy to store, with the right facilities. Flavour, ease of storage at home and suitability for various methods of preparation, are all secondary considerations.

That so called cheese is IMO more about the texture once its melted with the hot (if you're lucky) burger then is about taste. If you want real flavour slap a slice of mature cheddar in there and you won't go far wrong.

[tggzzz]

That so called cheese is IMO more about the texture once its melted with the hot (if you're lucky) burger then is about taste.

And appearance.

Just like strawberries and almost everything you buy in supermarkets and/or out of season.

[AVGresponding]

Regard him as an engineer given the instruction of developing an edible substance with certain properties conforming to a loose description of cheese. This is the low cost, high performance version of cheese, value engineered, and with certain properties desirable to McDonalds being optimised. A colour selected by a customer approval panel, looking OK when melted and with a convenient m.p., convenient storage and handling properties. and not definitely poisonous. They are not looking for something which would win the approval of cheese connoisseurs.

I've only had McDonalds a couple of times. It was OK. I'd do it again at need. I wouldn't go out of my way to have more. They've obviously managed to come up with a winning formula.

Something similar is true for supermarket potatoes. They have properties convenient for supermarkets. A similar size, smooth so they can be mechanically cleaned and are easy to peel, properties that make them easy to store, with the right facilities. Flavour, ease of storage at home and suitability for various methods of preparation, are all secondary considerations.

That so called cheese is IMO more about the texture once its melted with the hot (if you're lucky) burger then is about taste. If you want real flavour slap a slice of mature cheddar in there and you won't go far wrong.

Mature cheddar is too strongly flavoured, and overpowers the flavour of the burger.

[tggzzz]

Regard him as an engineer given the instruction of developing an edible substance with certain properties conforming to a loose description of cheese. This is the low cost, high performance version of cheese, value engineered, and with certain properties desirable to McDonalds being optimised. A colour selected by a customer approval panel, looking OK when melted and with a convenient m.p., convenient storage and handling properties. and not definitely poisonous. They are not looking for something which would win the approval of cheese connoisseurs.

I've only had McDonalds a couple of times. It was OK. I'd do it again at need. I wouldn't go out of my way to have more. They've obviously managed to come up with a winning formula.

Something similar is true for supermarket potatoes. They have properties convenient for supermarkets. A similar size, smooth so they can be mechanically cleaned and are easy to peel, properties that make them easy to store, with the right facilities. Flavour, ease of storage at home and suitability for various methods of preparation, are all secondary considerations.

That so called cheese is IMO more about the texture once its melted with the hot (if you're lucky) burger then is about taste. If you want real flavour slap a slice of mature cheddar in there and you won't go far wrong.

Mature cheddar is too strongly flavoured, and overpowers the flavour of the burger.

Iff the burger has flavour in the first place. But I tend to agree.

I certainly wouldn't put good cheese in a burger or toastie, since I like a good cheese's flavour and (especially) texture. The MacDonalds stuff had neither, and I couldn't detect any redeeming virtue.

In the same way that much ice cream should be called "ice non-dairy-fat-whitener", so that stuff should be called something like "edible-vinyl-flooring".

[MED6753]

I like a good, sharp cheddar which is readily available here and is made here. But how it stacks up against a genuine UK cheddar I can't say since I've not sampled it. The very mild cheddar typically used on cheeseburgers is "American cheese" which is almost tasteless and hardly qualifies as cheese. And some of it is "Process cheese food" which is absolute garbage and has the consistency of rubber.

Same goes for "Domestic Swiss" which is terrible compared to the genuine Swiss.

[bd139]

So what you're saying is America is shit?

[MED6753]

Given the current political climate and other assorted asinine stuff it's definitely a floater circling the toilet flush.

[tggzzz]

I like a good, sharp cheddar which is readily available here and is made here. But how it stacks up against a genuine UK cheddar I can't say since I've not sampled it. The very mild cheddar typically used on cheeseburgers is "American cheese" which is almost tasteless and hardly qualifies as cheese. And some of it is "Process cheese food" which is absolute garbage and has the consistency of rubber.

Same goes for "Domestic Swiss" which is terrible compared to the genuine Swiss.

The quality of all UK hard cheeses varies from "good enough for mousetraps and toasties" to "sublime". For me a key requirement is the texture: dry (i.e. hard!) and crumbly.

I expect UK mice would turn their noses up at MacDonald's "cheese".

[tggzzz]

So what you're saying is America is shit?

People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones

[MED6753]

The quality of all UK hard cheeses varies from "good enough for mousetraps and toasties" to "sublime". For me a key requirement is the texture: dry (i.e. hard!) and crumbly.

Agreed. Dry, crumbly, and sharp.

I expect UK mice would turn their noses up at MacDonald's "cheese".

UK mice might not like it but the unwashed masses certainly do as witnessed by all the giant fat asses in yoga pants that assault me on a daily basis.

[tggzzz]

The quality of all UK hard cheeses varies from "good enough for mousetraps and toasties" to "sublime". For me a key requirement is the texture: dry (i.e. hard!) and crumbly.

Agreed. Dry, crumbly, and sharp.

I'm also thinking of cheeses you probably don't see in the US. For example, I'm rather partial to a good Double Gloucester - which is much more mellow than most Cheddars. Similarly Cheshire and Lancashire.

I expect UK mice would turn their noses up at MacDonald's "cheese".

UK mice might not like it but the unwashed masses certainly do as witnessed by all the giant fat asses in yoga pants that assault me on a daily basis.

We can't throw stones in that regard

The current fashion is to blame "ultraprocessed foods", which are as well defined and understood as Dark Energy and Dark Matter and Luminiferous Æther.

[bd139]

So what you're saying is America is shit?

People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones

C'mon now. It's England so It's not glass. It's a crumbling damp asbestos roofed shed.

[Zenith]

I like a good, sharp cheddar which is readily available here and is made here. But how it stacks up against a genuine UK cheddar I can't say since I've not sampled it. The very mild cheddar typically used on cheeseburgers is "American cheese" which is almost tasteless and hardly qualifies as cheese. And some of it is "Process cheese food" which is absolute garbage and has the consistency of rubber.

Same goes for "Domestic Swiss" which is terrible compared to the genuine Swiss.

The quality of all UK hard cheeses varies from "good enough for mousetraps and toasties" to "sublime". For me a key requirement is the texture: dry (i.e. hard!) and crumbly.

I expect UK mice would turn their noses up at MacDonald's "cheese".

As you say, it varies a lot from cheap mild Cheddar in supermarkets which is bland, to the stuff you get at cheese counters in better supermarkets, to artisan cheese sold in specialist shops.

Some of the milder cheeses come into their own when toasted.

Peanut butter is the killer bait for mousetraps.

[tautech]

Peanut butter is the killer bait for mousetraps.

As is bacon rind.

[tggzzz]

Peanut butter is the killer bait for mousetraps.

As is bacon rind.

Peanut butter I use. Bacon rind I didn't know, but only have it rarely.

[MED6753]

We can't throw stones in that regard

The current fashion is to blame "ultraprocessed foods", which are as well defined and understood as Dark Energy and Dark Matter and Luminiferous Æther.

It's actually quite simple. Ultraprocessed foods, too many carbs, too much sugar. Result: A nation of blimps.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tz9OJyyJrBQ

[vk6zgo]

That so called cheese is IMO more about the texture once its melted with the hot (if you're lucky) burger then is about taste. If you want real flavour slap a slice of mature cheddar in there and you won't go far wrong.

Mature cheddar is too strongly flavoured, and overpowers the flavour of the burger.

Iff the burger has flavour in the first place. But I tend to agree.

I certainly wouldn't put good cheese in a burger or toastie, since I like a good cheese's flavour and (especially) texture. The MacDonalds stuff had neither, and I couldn't detect any redeeming virtue.

In the same way that much ice cream should be called "ice non-dairy-fat-whitener", so that stuff should be called something like "edible-vinyl-flooring".

Those of us "furrinners" who experienced the horror of English fast food in the 1970s could only regard the advent of MacDonalds & the like as a radical leap forward in the food scene in that "green & pleasant land".

[tggzzz]

Mature cheddar is too strongly flavoured, and overpowers the flavour of the burger.

Iff the burger has flavour in the first place. But I tend to agree.

I certainly wouldn't put good cheese in a burger or toastie, since I like a good cheese's flavour and (especially) texture. The MacDonalds stuff had neither, and I couldn't detect any redeeming virtue.

In the same way that much ice cream should be called "ice non-dairy-fat-whitener", so that stuff should be called something like "edible-vinyl-flooring".

Those of us "furrinners" who experienced the horror of English fast food in the 1970s could only regard the advent of MacDonalds & the like as a radical leap forward in the food scene in that "green & pleasant land".

Waddayou mean? You didn't like Wimpys?

It is difficult for youngsters to begin to comprehend how much has improved since the 60s.

[vk6zgo]

Iff the burger has flavour in the first place. But I tend to agree.

I certainly wouldn't put good cheese in a burger or toastie, since I like a good cheese's flavour and (especially) texture. The MacDonalds stuff had neither, and I couldn't detect any redeeming virtue.

In the same way that much ice cream should be called "ice non-dairy-fat-whitener", so that stuff should be called something like "edible-vinyl-flooring".

Those of us "furrinners" who experienced the horror of English fast food in the 1970s could only regard the advent of MacDonalds & the like as a radical leap forward in the food scene in that "green & pleasant land".

Waddayou mean? You didn't like Wimpys?

It is difficult for youngsters to begin to comprehend how much has improved since the 60s.

The Aussies, Yanks & Canucks used to get together & whinge about the "food scene".
Dunno why no Kiwis joined in----maybe they could survive on "Fush n' Chups".

It was crazy, because if we were lucky enough to have a home cooked meal, it was always far superior to the "bought stuff", so there were good cooks around.
Maybe it is tied up with something I have noticed over the years, that a sizeable proportion of small business proprietors of English origin actively hate their customers---sort of a "Basil Fawlty" syndrome.
I have not noticed the same attitude from Welsh & Scottish people.

[tggzzz]

It is difficult for youngsters to begin to comprehend how much has improved since the 60s.

The Aussies, Yanks & Canucks used to get together & whinge about the "food scene".
Dunno why no Kiwis joined in----maybe they could survive on "Fush n' Chups".

It was crazy, because if we were lucky enough to have a home cooked meal, it was always far superior to the "bought stuff", so there were good cooks around.

Those people never had wartime rationing, which only ended in the 1950s.

The rationing meant that they would have to eat anything that was available. A classic example was whale meat, which was so disliked that it was never called that. Instead there was whacon (i.e whale corned meat), British Meat, and a name beginning with "s" that I temporarily can't find.

Hence decent restaurants were few and far between, and for special occasions only.

Maybe it is tied up with something I have noticed over the years, that a sizeable proportion of small business proprietors of English origin actively hate their customers---sort of a "Basil Fawlty" syndrome.
I have not noticed the same attitude from Welsh & Scottish people.

I think I'd be like that if I worked in retail.

The Welsh and Scottish don't need an outlet for their "frustrations"; they just use the English.